In Pictures: CEOs Microsoft missed

In Satya Nadella, Microsoft played it sensible. Here are the Ballmer successors we tech wags wanted to make our Redmond-flogging jobs a little easier

1. Robert X. “Ol’ Blue Eyes” Cringely Sinatra gave me the name when we woke up together next to an empty Scotch cask in the summer of ’72. We forged a lifelong bond that day. My suitability for the top Microsoft post is obvious. Blessed with handsome looks, a genius IQ, a complete lack of hubris, and the ability to deal with any kind of pressure or crisis as long as I have access to a wet bar, there really was no better candidate currently inhabiting the planet. So it’s time to admit the hoax, Microsoft. Nadella isn’t your man; I am.

If I’m not, and don’t make a few billion soon, Pammy’s going to dump me for an old LPGA girlfriend named Slerma. Microsoft, you’re my last great hope!

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