If you’re one of the handful of people who still haven’t bought an Apple iPod, it’s time to bite the bullet and join the rest of society. After all, you do
want to fit in, don’t you? Or would you prefer to be an OUTCAST who REFUSES TO CONFORM? By the end of the year, non-iPod owners will be sent to separate schools and be forced to stand on the bus. New laws will be passed that require them to wear special badges in public. Zune owners will be taken out and quietly machine-gunned. If you want a vision of the future, imagine an iPod shuffle stamping on a human face forever.
But there’s still time to join the winning side. By buying an iPod touch ($549) and a pair of Apple In Ear Headphones ($109), you will have demonstrated due obedience to our Apple overlords. (We're joking of course, but we’re sick to death of gushing about the iPod touch — just go out and buy it, okay?)