Meowlingual and Bowlingual Pet Translators
Want to know what your pets really think about you? Well, I don't, but apparently some people do. Japan-based Takara Tomy has come out with two electric consoles, the Meowlingual and the Bowlingual (for cats and dogs, respectively), that translate all of your pet's deepest thoughts and feelings. Each device's technology slots a meow or bark into one of six standardized emotion categories (the categories differ between species) and then announces a humorous phrase to represent that emotion. For example, if your cat lets out a meow while you're lovingly petting it, Meowlingual will announce "I can’t stand it!" And all that time, you thought it liked being scratched behind the ears.
An English version of Bowlingual released in the United States with limited success, but Meowlingual never made it over. Unless your cat speaks Japanese (and you understand it), you probably won't want to fork out $75 plus overseas shipping for the device.